kadang-kadang
ia tak bermaksud ....

aku diam
aku x paham

aku tangis
aku sedih

aku senyum
aku suka

aku marah
aku benci

aku menyerah
aku lemah

aku angguk
aku setuju

so lately ...

It is tiring forcing tears to stop streaming down from my precious eyes.

(Dzeti, 2008)

Mr.X yg aku kenai ...

Dia ...

Dia suka amik gamba ...

Hari2 dia amik gamba ...

Dia suka edit gamba ...

Hari2 dia upload gamba ...



Aku plak ...

Aku suka dia amik gamba ...

Aku suka dia edit gamba ...

Aku suka dia upload gamba ...


Sebab,


Aku SANGAT SUKA DIA



Tapi...
kalau aku kena pilih...
between Batman or Mr. X ...
Aku pk 2 kali kot..
sebab Batman dh ada 6 packs
tp Mr.X half pack pon x nmpk lg...

hahah...

the best holiday in my life with my BFF 2008

BRISBANE

sahabat

kami dan pokok christmas

Gold Coast

pervert time

movie world

Hard Rock Cafe Surfers Paradise

kami

SYDNEY

rumah opera

kawan2 saya

pose b4 melintas...

together wif 'penduduk2 asal' australia~

thanks for always being a part of me ...

mint ct: mama mcm wat hal sendirik ja
mint ct: knapa?
mint ct: x phm aku
mint ct: kita pon anak dia gak
mint ct: tensionla
mint ct: aku ja yg kol dia
mint ct: dia x pnah kol aku pon
greenyfrogy_chan: min
greenyfrogy_chan: dia ada better life..y should dia igt blik id0p dia yg dlu?
greenyfrogy_chan: yakni kita?

So you've been cheated on. It's devastating -- like being kicked in the gut and thrown into the gutter. You can't eat or function at work. Or maybe you're up all night watching old movies, bawling, and eating pints of Baskin Robbins. Discovering your partner's affair gives you such heartache and pain that you doubt you'll ever recover.

But when the cheater tries hard to win you back, some questions loom large: Should you forgive him/her? Is this cheater going to cheat again? You may feel torn; perhaps wanting to take your remorseful partner back, but you feel like it's a point of pride not to. You may want to drop the cheater altogether, dive into an online personals pool, and start looking for a more loyal significant other.

Love is cinta

"Cinta itu buta dan juga boleh membutakan
melukakan dan sukar untuk kita lupakan
Aku cinta padamu hanyalah ungkapan
luahan yang jarang bermakna bila diucapkan"

(Too Phat & Siti Nurhaliza)

There is no attempt for me to become any 'minah gwang' by writing this post. This lyric just came across my mind when i was tired thinking of some ideas for my blog. When i heard this song at the first time, i started realise on how stupid a person can be because of love. when you're falling in love with someone, you will never regret on how much time, money, tears that you have spent for that someone. then when something happen between you and your loved one, you will curse yourself all the day on how stupid you are...but then..you end up to do the same mistake again. i dunno either to say it a mistake or not..because what i can say is you cannot control yourself when you in love with someone especially when you love that person too much. m i right?love is all about give amd take.but it hurts when you the only one who always give in all the time just because to keep it. people say you can teach your partner and you need to be patience in order to wait for him to learn.but till when?till you realise that you just tired of it?just a point to ponder~

Adoilaa~

Haish..rasa cm dh lama x conteng apa2 kt blog ni.rindula plak..lately,agak bz.sgt2 bz dgn kerja.which make me realizes that sometimes i forget about my priority to be here ...STUDY. Exam is just around the corner.in a week time.but i haven't start anything yet.I need a reinforcement to start everything...huhu.waaa..help me.sometime rasa cm nak lari jauh2 pastuh jerit kuat2.mesti rasa puas sgt.Kdg2 rasa cm nangis tp there is no shoulder to lean on.aku dh x letih asyik pendam ja apa yg aku rasa. penat asyik ckp..."its ok", "im ok", "xpala","im not dat lemah, k","bleh2"...im tired of jaga hati suma org.Hati parent kena jaga, hati family kena jaga, hati kwn2 kena jaga, hati aku???Adoi...sakit dude.Aku dh x larat nak buat poker face. Aku bukan reti main poker pon. huhu. Sometime i just need some attention...aku x mintak lebihla.i just need someone to listen...listen...listen.

p/s: im not in a PMS condition rite now!!!

thought of the day ...

"It is not easy to love someone that you really love"

random~

lately, things become so complicated. dunno where to start.mayb this is because it is the last week of the 2nd semester. loads of esaimen and tests.EDUC 225,LAGTECH 300, ESOL 202, LIGUIST 203. im so pening. but, ill try to be calm as much as i can. i dont want people to look at me as im a weak and passive person.obviously im not. but, these few weeks, i realize that ive became a bit more sensitive than usual. its quite easy for me to let my tears fall down to my cheek. even only for some small matters. well, maybe im a bit tired rite now. working, studying, observing, loving, giving ...

Speaking about working...i think i have to work more. since im planning to visit my girlfrens in Aussie. im so excited. going to goldcoast, brissy, and finally sydney. huhu~Besides, im still thinking of what im going to buy with my salary..i need to buy smtg.no more shopping for clothes, bags and shoes.i want to buy smtg that ill value the most.smtg that i can use everyday..
below is the list of one of the stuff that im going to buy:
1. PSP
2.Ipod
3.Iphone
4. Speaker
5. video camera
6. MP3

wait a minute..why everything has to be an electronic gadget?so weird..i think i have to modify the list again..huhu.till now..minty~

Credit to nohara ...

Oh God, I'm feeling totally bitchy right now.
Coz i need to be "bitchier" than that bitch who used to be sooo bitchy!
Guess what?
She still is!
Want to prove who is bitchier?
GAME ON, BITCH!"

p/s: semua org asyik bitchie2 ja..aku pon nak jgk!!

bosan, bosan...boring~

10.40 a.m..19/09/2008..friday..

Class: Introduction to dreamweaver CS3

OMG~ dis class is so bosan.at first, my fren and i wanted to skip the class.unfortunately, our coordinator become soo strict with this class.tension2.so, instead of learning to create a website for this class, i decide to write a blog..tp, no ideala plak..huhu.suddenly, after a moment of random thinking, i feel that the main reason the person in front of me teaches us about how to create this 'i-dunno-wat' website is atceli to sell the software..btoi x?since after she explained everything about how to do that website, she says that the vital part of it is to have the software.hahah..very bangang.if nak surh bli pon, ckpla dr awal..ksian bdk2 yg excited follow the class..

past, present,future

"Revenge Is Sweeter (Than You Ever Were)"

		http://www.mp3lyrics.org/PjHZ
I saw it in the news You told me they were wrong And I stood up for you 'Cause I believed you were the one You had all the chances in the world To let me know the truth What the hell's wrong with you? Are you even listening when I talk to you? Do you even care what I'm going through? Your eyes stare and they're staring right through me You're right there but it's like you never knew me Do you even know how much it hurt, When you gave up on me to be with her? Revenge is sweeter than you ever were I'm so mad at you right now I can't even find the words And you're on the way down I can't wait to see you burn You try to make me hate that girl When I should be hating you What the hell's wrong with you? Nothing can save you now that it's over I guess that you'll find out when you're no one Don't say you're sorry now 'cause I just don't care

Pesan ayah ...

One thing that i like the most about my dad is the fact that he always write a note in the front page of every book that he bought for his children. For him, the notes are like reminders for us.

This is what my dad wrote in my notebook that he gave it to me at the airport before i flew to Aukland,

"Dear Kak Min,

you make us proud.
Use your time wisely.
Sembahyang adalah satu ibadah dan juga akidah.

I love you.

Ayah
(Mon-18/02/2008)

PLEASE!!

people
please
im begging you
please
stop giving me hope
im tired
im not strong like before
i cannot stand it anymore
i cannot pretend anymore
i cannot fake this smile anymore
please..
no more~

thanks mum

couple of days ago, i called my mum and finally she did answering my call which means that it was the 2nd time we had our conversation for all this year. well, we spoke about several stuff since it is hardly for my mum and i to communicate and meet each other.it reminds me that when i was an adolescent, i always felt that she never care care about me, she proud of nothing about me and she do nothing for me except for helping me to see this wonderful (sometimes )by giving birth to me. however, there was one thing that she mentioned which made me feel that she also know something about me.during our 'mum and daughter' conversation, she said, " Don't always keep everything inside. I know you always keep things in your heart since you were young." Her words make me realize that it is true...I always listen and listen to what people say. but, its hard for me to let people to listen on what i feel. actually,i hate myself for having this kind of demeanor. i just can't see myself expressing something to others. at this moment, i just want my mum to know that it is hard for me to express what i feel to people and she should know she is the reason for that..I always want you to listen to me from the beginning of my life but you we're not there until now.You are the one who teach me to keep it everything since your life is to busy with more important people but me...and for that i thank you~

saat ini

tersepit aku
di antara dua cinta
tanpa arah tuju
tidak mampu aku
memilih diantara satu

makin difikir
makin menyentap sakit badan ini
kerna
tiada yang tahu
mata ini memandang
telinga ini mendengar
jantung ini kencang
hati ini meraung
jeritan jiwa ini semakin kuat
tidak mampu lagi ditahan
tapi
sayang sekali
mulut ini terkatup
erat ...

Boys Are Hard To Please....

Boys Are Hard To Please
The problems with GUYS:

If u TREAT him nicely, he says u are IN LOVE with
him;
If u Dont, he says u are PROUD.

If u DRESS Nicely, he says u are trying to LURE him;
If u Dont, he says u are from KAMPUNG.

If u ARGUE with him, he says u are STUBBORN;
If u keep QUIET, he says u have no BRAINS.

If u are SMARTER than him, hell lose FACE;
If hes Smarter than u, he is GREAT.

If u dont Love him, he tries to POSSESS u;
If u Love him, he will try to LEAVE u.(very true huh?)

If u tell him your PROBLEM, he says u are
TROUBLESOME;
If u dont, he says that u dont TRUST him.

If u SCOLD him, u are like a NANNY to him;
If he SCOLDS u, it is because he CARES for u.

If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot be TRUSTED;
If he BREAKS his, he is FORCED to do so.

If u SMOKE, u are BAD girl;
If he SMOKES, he is GENTLEMEN.

If u do WELL in your exams, he says its LUCK;
If he does WELL, its BRAINS.

If u HURT him, u are CRUEL;
If he HURTS u, u are too SENSITIVE!! & sooo hard
to please!!!!!

me ..lately~

Ida Scott Taylor once wrote:

""..Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering...""

babe...my new shoes~

huhu~
i've just bought myself new shoes
im so excited!!
really luv these lovely shoes..
seriously~

i really luv dis shoes
but still cannot wear it
since my right knee is not ok yet~
sport injury..huhu
definitely will wear it after dis~

rainbow stripes shoes
cool and comfortable
funky~

sparkle and elegance~

me, myself and i

Well, recently i did encounter and experience numerous events that assist me in viewing the world in other side. These events guide me to be know myself better and to know more about people around me. Yesteryears, i was afraid to do something since i know people might talk bad about things that you have done. BUT, now i don't care. People will talk about you everyday and they may say bad things about you. but, believe me ..it will not cost you anything..seriously~we cannot stop them but we can ignore them..IGNORANCE is bliss~always and always!!!

Apologize~

I'm holding on your rope,

Got me ten feet off the ground

I'm hearin what you say but I just can't make a sound

You tell me that you need me

Then you go and cut me down, but wait

You tell me that you're sorry

Didn't think I'd turn around, and say that...

It's too late to apologize,

it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize,

it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall

Take a shot for you

And I need you like a heart needs a beat

But it's nothing new

I loved you with a fire red

Now it's turning blue, and you say..

"Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you

But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
It's too late to apologize, it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

It's too late to apologize, yeah

I said it's too late to apologize, yeah-

I'm holdin on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground...

This is a sad song,you know you love someone but they disappoint you and take too long to make it up to you so that in the end you stop hoping they will come apologize even though you want to hear it from them..finally when they say something its past a point where you could have forgiven them and thought they cared about you...its very sad and the beats of the song suit it to perfection..

i should spend most of my time here..seriously~

people always leave no matter ...

people always leave no matter ...

how hard you keep them
how much you love them
how many times you give in
how well you change

they will leave you
even if you

have fought for them
have waited for them
have cried for them

it is hard to believe
but trust me..people will leave and always leave~

pagi yang gelap...

hari ni aku bgn awal (6 pagi) . al maklumla hari ni ada test and cam biasa aku x abeh lg bc buku (normal la tuh,kan?)..huhu.11 pagi nant aku ada interview keja (part time) dekat corpthorne viaduct hotel. dh byk tempat aku hantar cv and dis is the 1st place yg call aku blk 4 interview. hopefully, aku dpt keja tuh. kalu x, x bolehla aku nak enjoy lebih2 cos xdak duit. aku tgh kumpul duit nak travel skrang. july nant aku nak travel south island 4 2 weeks and dis september im planning to visit my friends in australia. and the most important part of saving my money is for my next year mission...around the world.huhu~after interview, aku ada meeting ngan tutor aku regarding aku punya marked assignment. pastuh test.adeh, sebut pasai test, aku kna p study dh ni. okla..x boleh nak mengarut byk2.test2~

i thought you'd be with me forever

i had to watch you walk away

something is slowly dying inside of me

if only you could see

the pain that i feel daily

has become all to familiar to me

my heart beats without a sound

i don't see how i go on

but still each day comes and goes

i have to fight to make it thru each one ...

p/s: from now, there is no more us between you and me~ maybe one day we will meet again but one thing i want you to know..dont ever ask me about my feeling for you bcos..the feeling is already gone~

the place i call home..in auckland~

my bed and my 1st teddy bear in auckland..nyet2~

my study desk..bunga tuh bunga idup..xmenla plastic2.wangi sgt~

huhu~niela bilik aku kt auckland...agak semak..tp, aku suka blk ni.dis is the only place where i can do everything dat i want..opps~huhu.

well,let me write dis post in malayla plak..huhu.gedixs btoi aku ni..x kesahla.ari nie aku sgt tension.dh dpt blk 2 marks 4 esaimen2 yg aku penat nak mampos wat sbelum ni. cr buku kt libraryla, photostatla,wat tebal muka pinjam material bdk2 len n mtk tlg bdk2 pandai check draft aku.huhu..but, the results are not dat marvelous like all the efforts dat ive done. waaa!!!nie yg wat aku rasa nak tukaq course ni.huhu. aku dh tataw nak wat cmna.td, dgn skemanya aku ngan kwn aku p cr tutor dkt learning centre..konon dh insafla.hopefully~aiyak..results dhla terok, bdn pon dh gemok...waaa!!and for ur guys information aku br ja register msk gym kt campus aku.mahai tahap dewa plak 2 (160 dollar)..nanges aku kalu bdn aku maintain gemok jgk.dhla ari2 asyik makan teloq ngan sardin ja (tuh ja yg plg murah kt cni) abesla aku.isk2.i've to do smtg regarding my assignment and my weight. kalu x nnt blk malaysia, confirm parent aku x kenai aku..huhu~

im tired~

i dunno how to start..im just tired. I used to miss someone so much.seriously~however, it never seemed like he missed me. Because of it, I stopped missing him. and because of it, the feeling has gone. before this, he used to call me every day, messaging me every minutes and chatting with me every nite. but suddenly everything changed. it started when he went to different place which is quite far from me.at first, i thought that he is busy with his study over there.then, i heard rumors about him with the other girl. i said to myself ..it just rumors. but then ... i cant hold it anymore when he didnt bother about me at all. i was the one who called him every day, kept on messaging him..whenever i called him, he said that he was busy with his assignment, tired..and has no money to come over to my place which is only cost him 39 bucks..i asked 4 a break up and he said nothing about it. i was flatted with his action. i thought he will ask for forgiveness or begging me not to break up with him.. but he said nothing at all. at that moment, i knew there must be something on his mind. our 3 years of relationship has become nothing to him..after we broke up, ive got the news that he was cheating on me with someone that i trust..my close friend in college. he, she and i used to be together..he never admit about it eventhough i said i already know and my close friend has admitted about it. until 2 weeks after that, he admitted. i dunno what hurts the most.the fact that he and my close friend was sneaking around my back or the fact that he lied about it straight to my face..i dunno...these days, i to be happy, pretend that im ok..but, im not. im tired of acting on something that im not..im just tired~