Along The Line

She left me 18 years ago yet she is still around.Deep down i feel the pain of knowing she chose not to get to know me. I couldn't remember when was the last time i saw her. Probably 7 years ago. We met only few hours. The last time I talked to her was a year ago.That would be the second time we talked in that year.It was when her husband passed away. I know it has been a tough time for her and to make things worse I couldn't be there. Its hard for me to decide. Ayah would probably feel disappointed if i suddenly when to see her.I couldn't blame him for that. I know he always tries his best to be both, mum and dad. To play her role. It killed me when she said i should stop keep in touch with her when I told her I couldn't be there for her that time.

To be honest, the only way for me to know about her is by stalking her daughter's facebook. By doing that, i know she is doing fine. I admit that Im a bit jealous to know how happy she is with her new children, daughters and sons..her new life. I never thought that i would feel heartache when i saw what she wrote to her daughter.Its simple but maybe i was over reacting.She said, "Good night dear. I'll cook your favorite food tomorrow." I kept on asking myself..she is a part of me. But does she know anything about me other than my name? Like what is my favourite food,what is my hobby..all the basic thingy.Then as my sister keep on saying, 'She has a new life. Why do u think she wants to look back at her past? I mean us'.

Everyone said that I look exactly like her and i have to admit that by looking at her pictures.Im no more a little girl that she left 18 years ago. I have grown up. I wish she is able to see how mature I am now and how I look like rite now.I wish i could talk to her. But im still waiting for the right time.Its never about the ego.Im just afraid. Afraid of talking to her might lead me to be dependent. Somehow she had taught me to be independent.If only she wasn't the one that got away...

Bodyrock Challenge

Lets work it out peeps.Honestly, im not very good in following any diet. Besides, Malaysia has so much tasty food and living with my parent doesn't help at all.lol. Gonna start my new work out routine starting on this month onwards.Used to do 100 push everyday but for the new challenge gonna be more on my abs.Will post more pics on the new workout soon..What i need right now is to stay focus and a good motivation!!

Pics of me practicing yoga at home

Virasana

Awww..Silly you

I dunno what hurts the most..the fact that somebody was sneaking around my back or the fact THAT someone lied about it straight to my face..duhh.This is so YESTERDAY!!

What i mean is being lied straight to my face when i know every bit of the truth.C'mon u shud plan smtg better than that lie. It was too obvious but then I didn't feel the pain. I dunno why. I shud feel sad and a bit of angry but it seems that im totally immune. I kinda realise that i shouldn't bother much about it as obviously through that lie, it shows that we have different level of maturity. You are so childish.No wonder you still stuck in nowhere while everyone around you already move on with a better life. .

p/s: Im not stupid..Im just not YOU~

Priority VS Option

If you spend too much time on holding on to someone who treats you like an option, you'll miss out chances on finding out the one who will put you as a priority.

Listen to Bob Marley

"You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there." -Bob Marley

BERSATU 2008

It was nearly three years ago when he entered my world. There was no magical chemistry shared and no fairy tale first meeting. It was simple and realistic. We were in the same Frisbee team representing our club back then in Auckland. We met few times during the training but there were not much talk as we were from different crowd. Few weeks later, our team went to Wellington for the Bersatu Game 2008.He was cute and friendly in his boyish charm.

BERSATU GAME 2008.He is always the one who got my back. Even in our first pic together, he was there behind my back.

Two weeks I accepted a friend request from him. By doing so, I had not expected an adventure to develop. A romance. The text and YM started out superficial. Surface level. But as time went on, and with each response the text and YM started to form depth, insight and understanding. Revealing and exposing ourselves. I started to know him. And him knowing me. I could sense something as everyone around us was kept talking about him to me. He started to comment my facebook and did few moves.I slowly started to fall for him. For his dreams, his thoughts, his passions. I kept this to myself, how silly it was to fall for someone that I just met.

It would be nearly a month till I went out with him after few times of him asking me out. He was true to what I had thought him to be. I was nervous to be around him. He gave me butterflies. But I pretended to be cool.We walked down the city, as we questioned on each other likes, loves, dislikes,dreams. Everything. One night while I had my first pizza in Auckland's Pizza Hut,he gave me a look that I would never forget. Nobody ever looked at me that way. With such desire. Such admiration.I wish I could have seen me through his eyes.We had a talk for nearly 3 hours. Till the restaurant closed.

Albert Park, 2009. During the Lantern Festival.

I returned home and later he text me saying,'Never in my life, I had that kind of talk with a girl. Guess I really fall for you.' I was very excited but I still played hard to get. The YM continued. The friendship deepened. My feelings intensified. It was more than a crush. He was a boy I was madly and deeply in like with.

A week later we went on our first date. He took me to a music shop as I wanted to learn on playing the guitar. He bought me my first guitar's pick that I still keep in my drawer. He played and gang my favourite song in that shop.Yes, cliche but I was over the moon. Few days later, we start see ourselves always doing many things together.Talking. Laughing. And of course ready for an adventure.

Times Square, 2010. Had blast during the AND1 tournament.

In Auckland, I had found a city I was in love with and a boy that had and still captivate my heart, mind and body. I had not thought it was possible for me to like someone this much. To feel this way.

He knows me well.All aspects of me. The good, the bad and the ugly. And he is still sitting there next to me. He is a genuinely good, simple, tender hearted man with flaws and faults I am clearly aware off. And I will still by his side. I want him, with his shortcomings and imperfection. All of him. I had never felt my heart to be so fragile and delicate. There is nothing more in this world that I want than for him to ask me to stay. This is obviously more than a seasonal fling. More than just a summer romance.

Kuala Lumpur 

Until now, we are happily together. Yes, there were and there will be ups and downs between him and me. We both never promise there will be sunshine everyday.

Dear You, thank you for making me laugh when I'd almost forgotten how to :)

A Sweet Thought :)

[3:52:52 PM] faliq idrus: u nk masak aper today??
[3:53:06 PM] mintymints87: suma dh masak
[3:53:08 PM] mintymints87: settle
[3:53:10 PM] mintymints87: hehe
[3:53:15 PM] mintymints87: i tgh basuh baju ja
[3:53:21 PM] mintymints87: mantap x?
[3:53:39 PM] faliq idrus: oh
[3:53:41 PM] faliq idrus: awal nyer masak
[3:53:43 PM] faliq idrus: x sejuk ka
[3:53:48 PM] faliq idrus: kang x best mkn
[3:53:56 PM] faliq idrus: u goreng sayur awal2 ka?
[3:54:02 PM] mintymints87: hehe..yg gulai n kuah
[3:54:08 PM] mintymints87: mak i masak awal2
[3:54:15 PM] mintymints87: yg goreng ptg sket
[3:54:19 PM] faliq idrus: ooo ok
[3:54:22 PM] mintymints87: takot kang xdak gas ka apa ka
[3:54:23 PM] faliq idrus: senang sket kan??
[3:54:24 PM] faliq idrus: hehehe
[3:54:40 PM] faliq idrus: nnti kalo kita da kawin
[3:54:48 PM] faliq idrus: u jgn susa2 masak k?
[3:54:50 PM] faliq idrus: u rehat jer
[3:54:54 PM] faliq idrus: kita beli jer makan
[3:54:56 PM] faliq idrus: ok??
[3:55:01 PM] mintymints87: awwww
[3:55:06 PM] faliq idrus: u kena workout jer
[3:55:09 PM] faliq idrus: hehehe
[3:55:14 PM] faliq idrus: masak xyah

p/s: I post dis on blog so that i have a proof one day if the BF suddenly changed his mind after we get married LOL

Me FART??

I asked the BF whether he misses some parts of me and he said...

[7/2/2011 2:33:08 PM] faliq idrus: not only that
[7/2/2011 2:33:11 PM] faliq idrus: but YOU
[7/2/2011 2:33:14 PM] faliq idrus: hehehe
[7/2/2011 2:33:15 PM] faliq idrus: most of all YOU
[7/2/2011 2:33:18 PM] faliq idrus: ur smile
[7/2/2011 2:33:23 PM] faliq idrus: ur giggle
[7/2/2011 2:33:26 PM] faliq idrus: ur voice
[7/2/2011 2:33:30 PM] faliq idrus: ur fart
[7/2/2011 2:33:35 PM] faliq idrus: hahahahaha
[7/2/2011 2:33:37 PM] faliq idrus: tipu je
[7/2/2011 2:33:41 PM] faliq idrus: u x pnah fart
[7/2/2011 2:33:42 PM] faliq idrus: hehe

p/s: I did and I do fart.Of cos,Im a human. But,totally not in front of u. Im a lady..act like a lady :)

Hooorayyyyy!!

Sorry for the late update.
Its not that I was busy with working or specifically schooling, it just because i was a bit lazy.hehe. BTW, I'm officially a graduate!!!


Officially, a graduate of B.Ed TESOL from The University of Auckland



My dad came eventhough he was not well and he had to travel by bus since it was a last minute decision. I was so happy to have him around that day :)


Well, people say flowers die. But then, my BF was so smart he bought me a bouquet of soap's flowers. It definitely won't die.haha. The BF was really helpful and cool on that day eventhough it was his first time meeting my parent. Thank you sweetheart :)





Overall,the convocation was more like a reunion as it was not that formal. I had so much fun. But then,I couldnt meet most of my friends as everyone had to entertained their families. Congratulation to all of us. We did it. Thank you for everything along the journey in IPBA and Auckland ;)

Skype Date

[12:49:11 AM] mintymints87: im heading 2 bed now..
[12:49:13 AM] mintymints87: huhu
[12:49:17 AM] mintymints87: gudnite sayang
[12:49:21 AM] faliq idrus: hehe
[12:49:25 AM] faliq idrus: im there
[12:49:33 AM] mintymints87: where?
[12:49:35 AM] faliq idrus: in ur heart
[12:49:53 AM] faliq idrus: seee
[12:50:03 AM] faliq idrus: im the sweetest person
[12:50:04 AM] faliq idrus: alive

Let's begin

This song makes me want to grab a guitar and start singing to my special someone. Too bad I suck at both of those ;)



You're stuck on me
and my laughing eyes
I can't pretend though
I try to hide, I like you
I like you.

I think I felt my heart skip a beat
I'm standing here and I can hardly breathe, you got me, yeah
You got me.

The way you take my hand is just so sweet
And that crooked smile of yours
it knocks me off my feet

Oh, I just can't get enough
Find my stoup I need to fill me up
It feels so good it must be love
It's everything that I've been dreaming of.
I give up. I give in. I let go. Let's begin.
Cause no matter what I do,
Oh (oh) my heart is filled with you.

I can't imagine what it'd be like
Livin each day in this life, without you.
Without you.

One look from you I know you understand
This mess we're in
you know is just so out of hand.

Oh, I just can't get enough
Find my stoup I need to fill me up
It feels so good it must be love
It's everything that I've been dreaming of.
I give up. I give in. I let go. Let's begin.
Cause no matter what I do,
Oh (oh) my heart is filled with you.

I hope we always feel this way
I know we will
and in my heart I know that
you'll always stay

Oh, I just can't get enough
Find my stoup I need to fill me up
It feels so good it must be love
I give up. I give in. I let go. Let's begin.
Cause no matter what I do
Oh, I just can't get enough
Find my stoup I need to fill me up
It feels so good it musIt's everything that I've been dreaming of.t be love
I give up. I give in. I let go. Let's begin.
Cause no matter what I do,
Oh (oh) my heart is filled with you.

Oh (oh)
You got me. You got me.
Oh (oh)
You got me. You got me.

More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/you_got_me_lyrics_colbie_caillat.html
All about Colbie Caillat: http://www.musictory.com/music/Colbie+Caillat

I don't need Bruno Mars

Woooot wooot!!! Obviously, I couldn't spend time watching Bruno Mars live at KL and yes, thank you so much for all the tweets on how AWESOME he was at the concert (pls do tell me smtg that I don't know *jealous mode*), I had so MUCH FUN this weekend. Despite all the hassles on booking few stuff and the airport's problem,everything was totally PERFECT!!

Spending the weekend celebrating the BF's birthday in KL besides went there for getting some important stuff was definitely walking down the memory lane. I mean even it was only just 3 and a half months, I did miss KL so bad. And missing the BF is another pain in the A$$..oops, I mean pain in the heart ;P

After few weeks of trying my best and using the puppy eyes to persuade the big boss @ my dad, I finally got the permission. So, then on Thursday after school,I straight away went to the airport. However, I didn't expect that there would be a traffic jam after the lunch hour.I mean come on, this is ALOR STAR not KUALA LUMPUR.And yet, there was a traffic. .long sigh~ I arrived at the airport 10 minutes before the departure time and to my surprise there were no more people line up and there were people at all. I thought it was probably because people here prefer to go to KL by bus and of course I was Super STUPID, rite?I should be there 30 minutes before the departure time. All the gates were closed already. I talked to the MAS officer and he said I was really late and all the passengers were already on the plane. Damnnnn..at that time, the only thing a girl like me could do is to use my superpower ... dropping some TEARS!!lol. I nearly cried and I knew that the officer could see the tears in my eyes. Suddenly, he called the pilot and told him to wait. He said emergency case.GOSH, thank u so much. I owe u a lot!!Seriously.

Then from KLIA,I took the KLIA express to KL Sentral and I can say that it's totally awesome. I bumped into my BFF,Alia's boyfriend, Yap. He looked a bit different so I was quite afraid to say hi to him..hehe.but I did.




Alia's BF said my face was berseri-seri when he met me.Its not berseri2 la..its obviously my peluh. I was sweating like tuuuttt carrying my heavy bags ;(


Overall, it was amazing weekend.I had so much fun with 'YOU - KNOW - WHO'.We had a dinner at Tony Romas since he really loves the ribs and I love what he loves. hehe. I also enjoyed watching Hop and Rio at the cinema. As for the birthday present, I gave him something that will remind him about me every second..a watch. I let him to choose as I prefer to give someone a present he or she loves and really2 will use it.

For my sayang, happy birthday. I love you more than you know.I enjoyed spending the weekend with you.Who needs Bruno Mars if I already have you?Thanks for the awesome weekend :)

Who do you think you are?

Trust me
My head always know better than my heart...



I know I can't take one more step towards you
Cause all that's waiting is regret
And don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore?
You lost the love
I loved the most

And I learned to live, half-alive
And now you want me one more time

Who do you think you are?
Runnin' round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are?

I hear you're asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

Dear, it took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
Cause you broke all your promises
And now you're back
You don't get to get me back

- Jar of hearts by Christina Perry

Hey kiddo

Last few week weren't the good weeks for me. It was a bit stressful as sometimes I felt that working life does effect my social life.How I wish I could turn back the clock... Auckland and IPBA had really help me to get the fullest of my life. But then stuck at school with a bunch of people who are mostly more 'mature' than me in the staff room and thousand of immature students who keep on testing my patience everyday, has really help me in rising the level of my burn out.

Thus, those past few weeks I couldn't help myself of not crying. Yes, I'm lucky to have my family around me as I stay at home. But to tell you the truth, to a certain extent, I really hope that my friends are here around me. Having people who are in the same level and ways of your thinking is good as it's easy to explain so many things to them.

Nonetheless, one day, the minute I lost hope on everything around me, something happened in my form four class the minute I had finished my lesson. One of my male students (the hardcore and the noisy one)stand up and said,

"Teacher, I wish I could have someone like you. If only my parent was like you. You always listen. No matter on what we said. " And all the students in the class kept on saying, 'Yeah, teacher. Its true."

I just could smile but deep inside me, I felt a huge impact.
I feel needed.
Thank you kiddo ...You not only made my day ;)

Would you do the same?

Heyloo beautiful people.It has been nearly a month that I left my blog without any update. The truth is I have plenty of ideas. But then,the ideas always come at night where I already sleepy ;)



Call me lame, but recently I fell in love with Bruno Mars's songs especially, 'Grenade'. How I wish I could go to his concert on this April 10.I probably will be in KL during the weekend only till 9..pfft. Working does effect my social life peeps.

Okay, back to the song. These few days I keep on listening to 'Grenade' and was thinking that the lyric is super AWESOME! Bruno is such a sweet talker. I wanna know who is his GF. It seems that he might has someone who inspire him to write these romantic songs. OH Goshhhh,please and please don't let it turn up to be a guy. It will effing ruin up my brain to know that all these wonderful songs are dedicated for a guy...I'll definitely will puke in my mouth *buekkk*

A Twisted Love

He didn't like the way I walked.
He didn't like the way I talked.

He said I was dumb and embarrassed him.
Who am I? Why am I grim?

No more friends. No calls from them.
Who am I? Why am I grim?

I didn't flirt with that dude.
Am I vulgar and crude?

What's wrong with the way I dress?
My hair, make-up? Do I really look like a mess?

If I need to change all that wrong with me,
Who am I? What will I be?

The silent treatment -- he's in control.
I'm so sad. Why don't I feel whole?

I must've done something wrong to him.
Who am I? Why so grim?

I can't remember happy days...
Only his possessive, jealous ways.

First a push, a little shove...
Is this it? Is this love?

I thought it was true...
People who love you don't hit you.

Love shouldn't mean I need to be hit.
Not once or twice, not one little bit.

If I should change all that wrong, you see,
There'd be nothing left of me.

I'm better now. I dumped the jerk.
And starting to regain some of my former perk.

I can laugh again and enjoy my life.
It's much easier without all that strife.

If he doesn't make you feel good about who you are.
Run. Run. Run so very far.

-Judy Terando-

School Matters

So Far So ?

Good?
Great?
Bad?
Gone?

.
.
.
.
.



Well,life so far is so la la~ Neither very good nor very bad.
But, it seems that I gradually learn to be more grateful ;)

Dilemma

Dear 'What-So-Ever',

You may drink, smoke, drugs and think your "hard". but in 2 years,while I've a job,a car,money and you don't, I'm gonna laugh in your face!!

Cyberlove

Hello beautiful people!!!

Do you believe in Internet love story?

Cyberlove is about couples who met via online chat or social networking like FB, Myspace, Friendster ( Goshh.. Do u still have ur friendster's accout? duhh~)and etc.Personally, its really hard for me to trust any kind of love story involves the Internet especially the one involves with LDR (LDR=Long Distance Relationship).In past few years, I had a perception that Internet romance was a bizarre method.Don't think the only danger to your emotions is the lies your partner may tell. Its a need to consider on safety.However, years came by now I do believe that Cyberlove works BUT only to a certain extent.Once again, COMMUNICATION plays such a large part in Cyberlove. Words that convey feelings have enormous effect. Well, for a real date, we usually fix our hair and our clothes to meet our partners, But then, on the internet we polish our intellect, imagination and personality. This reveals the true inner beauty of a person if she or he is sincere in that relationship.



Well,cut it short. The reason I do believe in Cyberlove is because my sis engages with this kind of relationship for about 3 years and yet she still happy with her relationship. They met each other on FB where they didn't have anything in common. Both of them are totally different. At the 1st stage of their relationship, I was a bit skeptical because I had a bad view on Cyberlove and I was afraid that it would hurt my sis badly. Today,eventhough she only met her partner for few times (due to the distance), they are still so lovey dovey ;) Now, her partner is quite famous, *coughDJHOTfmcough* but he still treats my sis well. He did mention about my sis when he was on air. And the best thing about my sis is that she always low profile about her BF ;)

Ashton's Advice

Sending sweet nothings on Twitter and Facebook is also fun. In some ways, its no different than sending flowers to the office - you are declaring your love for everyone to see. Who doesn't like to be publicly adored?

- Ashton Kutcher

p/s : But then please stop telling people on how sweet your BF/GF is every half an hour. Just text , tweet or write to his/her wall. Not that I'm jealous, its a bit annoying sometimes ;P

"When a Man Loves a Woman"

Like always, in every American Idol season, there would be a bit of typical "Idol" manipulation, a heartstring-tugging ploy used often in the early rounds.

However, this is probably the most emotional American Idol story of Chris Medina, whose tragic tale about his fiancée's car crash elicited a strong response from the judges.



Personally, I don't consider Chris Medina to be an extraordinary singer and compare to most of the idols, he is not in their level ... YET.His voice is not that special compared to most the idols but then like Steven Tyler said to Chris's fiancee, "I swear he sings so good cos he sings to you"..it sounds so good cos he sings for his love one ;) I do believe he'll likely go far on the show because of he is a genuinely nice guy with a big heart.

I almost cried when he said, "What kind of a guy would i be if i walked out when she needed me the most". I think it's normal for a woman to treat her man like this but it's really hard to find a man who have the courage to treat his lady like Chris did.Overall, I only wish that he will stay the same eventhough he'll get famous and yes he is. People change to a certain extent ;)

Commitment

How fully do you commit yourself in a relationship?

Do you dare to commit?



Personally, COMMITMENT doesn't scare me, the thought of committing to the wrong person does.
Nothing is worse than knowing at the end, he meant everything to you and you meant nothing to him.

A Simple Rule

If a guy paused his video game to text you back, marry him ;)

p/s: Same goes if he was watching TV, movie or doing some stuff in his room. A simple text like, 'I'm doing smtg. TTYL', will be great instead of nothing.

But then, if he chooses to ignore you, don't worry. Never stress about what's gone!!

Gentlemen never be a cheapskate! Cheap men are like cheap mascara. Both run when women cry. -Rick Warren

Things on Me

10 Things you would never have guessed about ME:

1. I tore my ligament twice on the same foot. And both happened in New Zealand (during Frisbee's training in Auckland and during the Bersatu Game in Wellington). In Auckland, the physio asked me not to join the Bersatu Game and I had to follow the therapy for 6 weeks.But then, my stubbornness led me to another incident which involved an ambulance in Wellington.lol.It was very annoying especially when you have to walk with a pair of crutches and everyone was looking at you with their 'sympathy eyes'.


2. I love Travel Discovery and Cuisine TV. I wish I could travel around the world and helping people. Hoping that my dad will kind enough to reconsider ASTRO again so that I able to watch Discovery Channel AGAIN!!. He terminated ASTRO since the twin boys have to seat for UPSR this year.

3. I can’t drive a car... YET!! Call me lame but I don't give a damnn.If only Malaysia were more like Europe or at least Auckland, public transport and scooter would be my best friends. And yes, of course walking sounds great too.

4. I have 2 secret ambitions, a writer and a fashion designer. Gimme 5 years to show you something ;)

5. I'm the most quite person among my siblings. yeah, you probably ROFLYAO rite now. Yes, I admit I talk a lot and really outgoing but then among all the debaters and story tellers in my family, I'm the quite one.



6. I love ANYTHING related to workout and my current obsessions these few months are yoga and hundred push ups. I do yoga around half to an hour a day while the hundred push ups usually 3 times a week. For the push ups, I normally will force myself to do hundred push ups in a time. Mind you, I'm not trying to be skinny.In fact, I hate to be skinny.I just want to tone my body.As I don't think I able to have a body like Kim Kardashian, Jessica Alba will be great ;)



7. I have a LOT of teddy bears and all of those were given by friends and secret admirers (lol) when I was in high school. I think around 25 to 30 teddy bears.

8. I could never turn vegetarian – why were we made carnivores otherwise?My resolution for past years was to be a vegetarian but then on the very first day of New Year itself, I always ended up eating MEAT..sigh~

9. Since I was 21, I never ask my parent for money. When I was in Auckland, I relied on the scholarship and my salary working part time in Uni. Then, when I came back to Malaysia, I still got a scholarship and got some saving in my account till now.This is a part of myself that I'm really proud of.I don't ask for money but then if my parent give me some, it will be very rude for me not to take ;)


10. I want to be the next Asha Gill, she is a Malaysia-based model, television host, deejay, veejay, writer, producer, film director, and women's rights activist. I want to be a Superwoman!!Despite the fact that the time is running out, I definitely love to see myself having good times doing something I really love to do. For that, I have to find a partner who is superSporting and outgoing and

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

I have successfully found him.
HAHHAHAHA bet you guys know who he is ;)

High School of Mine

3 Things I'll always remember when I was a student:

1. My name was the first name on the 'Rekod Kesalahan Pelajar Asrama' when I was in Form 3. I was caught 'fly' not 'high'(lmao) by the warden on the first week of school.It was a usual thing for me when I was in high school. My friends and I was quite popular in hostel for our 'good' attitudes ;)I believe that my future students won't expect that I was a trouble maker years back. A teacher should be a good actress though.lol

The pic was taken when I was in Form 3 and I loved to wear a bandanna or a cap when I was in the hostel..Poyo rite?

2. I love sport and games especially sprint race distance like 100m and 4 by 100m and I entered numbers of those when I was in primary till back in college. When I was in Form 1, I was selected to represent my red house (Semarak Api)to run for a 100m.But, I was too scared as I knew that my competitors would be my friends who have pairs of long legs and of course muscular bodies compared to me which was and still SHORT. Therefore, what I did was hiding myself in my locker in the hostel. I could hear the MC called my name few times during the sport day. As a result, my friend had to replace me as they couldn't find me. This is very exclusive people as I never tell anyone about this till now. I'm so SuperSorry teachers and friends. I was too innocent at that time.hehe


Try to find me in this pic ..hehe

3. Due to my level of IQ, I often been transferred to different classes when I was in high school. Not the good ones though. When I was in Form 1, I was in the 2nd class, form 2, 3rd class, form 3, 5th class. But then, when I was in Form 4 and Form 5 since it depends on your subjects for SPM. Mind you, I took 11 papers for SPM. The funniest part of everything was my dad came to my school when I was in form 3 and that was the 1st time he came for the report card day.So, he thought that I was still in the 2nd class just like when I was in form one. He then went to the 2nd class and asking for me. Obviously, he was pissed off when my teacher said,'Najmin? I know her.She is not from this class. You have to walk to the end of the building to her class'. My teacher tried to be polite as possible and trying not to say like, 'Najmin? Definitely not from this class.Too 'clever' to be in this class.She is in the last class, 3D,'. But then, thanks to my teachers and of course my parent for showing the light when I was in Form 5 so that I turn up to be the person I am right
now ;)

p/s:I still remember what did my science teacher said to me. She said that I won't get A for her subject, science,for PMR as I always skipped her class by 'lepaking' at the toilet.I also loved to eat nasik lemak in my classroom when she was teaching at the front.And yes, Ive got 7As and a B for her subject. I could see her smiled at me when I took my result.Till now, I always remind my students and brothers on the importance of the relationship between a teacher and a student.Do respect your teacher if you want 'Berkat' in your study :)

Chris Brown & Rihanna

The first and the last (it should be the only) concert I've been to when I was in Auckland was a concert performed by Rihanna and Chris Brown. If I'm not mistaken, it was a week after my first Eid (Aidilfitri) in Auckland.

I've got a text from my BF. He told me that Chris Brown was going to Auckland. I was so excited that I still save the text in my hp till now (ok, by now I haven't change my hp for quite numbers of years..dammmn. Will getting a BB soon. Depending on how soon I get the posting.lol)I didn't expect that Rihanna would come along at first. Knowing that, I worked harder and ask my Boss to give me more shift. By that time, I looked like a part time student and a full time worker.I worked for 40 hours for a weeek. Double shifts a day from 8a.m to 4 p.m and from 7p.m to 11 p.m and taddaaaaaa..I bought the tickets.



Well, the funniest part was, I've got a call two days before the concert telling me that i won two free tickets to the concert.lol. I entered a lucky draw in my workplace.I didn't expect that I would get the ticket minus the fact that I kept on asking people whether they wanted their receipt for the 'V' drinks or not so that I could use the receipts and wrote down my name for the lucky draw.FYI,'V' is one of the famous energy drink in NZ but my stomach couldn't handle it well. I prefer the colourful Vitamin drink compared to 'V'. When I was in Auckland, I didn't spend much money on drinks as I always got free drinks. Thanks to Munchy Mart ;)

Okay, back to the concert. The concert was really amazing and memorable. I don't think you are able to see both of them together anywhere in these few years as they are not in a good term rite now.It would be much fun if only I could memorize every single word for every song ;( Here some random pics during the concert.

Of Love and Good Bye

GIRL: Your new girl friend is pretty. (I bet she stole your heart)
BOY: Yeah, she is. (But you're still the most beautiful girl I know)
GIRL: I hear she's funny and amazing. (All the stuff I wasn't...)
BOY: She sure is. (But she's nothing compared to you)
GIRL: I bet you know everything about her by now. (Just like you used to know eerything about me)
BOY: Only the stuff that count. (I can't remember what she says when I think of you)
GIRL: Well... I hope you guys last. (Cause we never did)
BOY: I hope we do too. (Whatever happened to me and you?)
GIRL: Well I have to go. (Before I start to cry)
BOY: Yeah me too. (I hope you don't cry)
GIRL: Bye. (I still love you)
BOY: Later. (I never stopped)

Of Posting and Chilling

49 days has passed.And yet, im still at home.Doing nothing.I'm tired when people keep asking me when, where or anything related to the posting because me, myself have no idea about the posting too. Few weeks ago, i would feel like an idiot or a loser when people asked me about posting. The truth is all 129 students in my cohort also don't have any news about our posting. Today,my feeling towards posting is indifferent.I'm tired of waiting and to be honest I have less motivation to teach. I prefer to be at home. Chilling and doing the house chores :P Now, I'm quite occupied with my daily routine. And my dad keep on calling me as his new bibik ;( Mind you, I prefer to be called maid instead of bibik. Make it more interesting, how about 'french maid'? roflmao



9 am - wake up
10 am - play wif the babies and chiko and feed them
11 am - fold all the clothes,wash all the dishes, prepare lunch, sweep and mopping the floor.
2 pm - feed babies and chiko
3 pm - wash clothes
5.30 pm - yoga and push ups time

7 pm - feed babies and chiko
8 pm - watching tv and my internet time
10 pm - feed babies and chiko again

And usually my sleeping time is around 2 a.m.

Okay,u can say that this routine is quite bored and i felt the same too. But, its ok.im used to it rite now. Being at home sometimes can be quite interesting especially when u don't have to spend much of your own money.lol.

You are too Sweet too handle

Okay, on the previous entry I wrote about PMS. A syndrome which quite hard for me to handle. I wrote about PMS since I was going through it tonight. A bit depressing. But, you know what? I think I found my solution already. A thoughtful and a sweet text for my loved one simply able to help me ;)

Hopefully I will always remember this -

"Hi I nk ckp I luv u,hopefully dis msg arrive at 11.11pm on 11.01.11 hehe"


Thank u sweetheart..
Of course, there will be a few problems along the way especially during the time of the month, but I do LOVE u too!!!

PMS

whenever, I've got PMS, I'll normally stress out.I hate the feeling.I wish I could do something about this instead of trying too hard to be positive. But, I read that most of women suffer of this stupid + annoying syndrome.For people around me, I'm so sorry that sometimes I'll be a bit harsh and hard to understand when I've got my PMS.Trust me,I'm so sorry. I'm trying my best not get affected by the syndrome :P

PMS - Possibility Min Stress

It won't only be a dream ;)

I was thinkin about you, thinkin about me.
Thinkin about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah, it was only just a dream.
So I drive on back, down that road.
When you comin back? No one knows.
I realize, yeah, it was only just a dream.

I was at the top and now was like I'm at the basement.
Number one spot and now you found her a replacement.
I swear now I can't take it, knowing somebody's got my baby.
And now you ain't around, baby I can't think.
Shoulda put it down. Shoulda got that ring.
Cuz I can still feel it in the air.
See your pretty face run my fingers through your hair.

My lover, my life. My baby, my wife.
You left me, I'm tied.
Cuz I knew that it just ain't right.

When I be ridin man I swear I see your face at every turn.
Tryin to get my usher over, I can't let it burn.
And I just hope you notice you the only one I yearn for.
Oh I miss you when will I learn?

Didn't give you all my love, I guess now I got my payback.
Now I'm in the club thinkin all about my baby.
Hey, you was so easy to love. But wait, I guess that love wasn't enough.

I'm goin through it every time that I'm alone.
And now I'm missin, wishin you'd pick up the phone.
But she made a decision that you wanted to move on.
Cuz I was wrong.

Along The Line

2011
It has been 17 years.And yet I'm still counting. I'm still thinking and of course I'm still trying to let it go. People say time heals everything. Still time has not prove me anything so far.

I don't know who to blame. It was so long ago, but I know somewhere along the line, it happened because of me. You were really in love and married a very kind and lovely man, But then,I came to your life and suddenly all things got matters.Money,relationship, style ... which you've got to change because of me.

Most people said, it's too painful to loss their moms because of death when they were still young. But,at least, they know and everyone around them knows that their moms loved them. In my case, you left me. You chose to leave. I don't know what hurts the most. The thought that I don't have the chance to know you or the thought of knowing you chose better not to know me.

Yesterday, I saw some Year 1 students went to school for the first time. It always reminds me of you. To tell you the truth, it hurts me badly whenever the memory comes across my mind. I wish you were there on my first day of school like other parents will do. At least, to send me to school.I had to admit that I was the one who woke myself up, ironed my uniform (got my first scar on my arm)and packed my stuff into my school bag.Thanks God, u left my school file on the table so that I could register my own self on my first day at school. Since the Year 1 students had their schooling on the evening session, I had to decide whether I wanted to go to school or to take care of my little sister at home since I always had to take her from the nanny's home at 12 p.m. It was a hard decision to make by a 7 year old girl. Contemplating of going to school but still worried about my sister. But then, I went to school since I couldn't resist the temptation of looking at my friends walked to school with their uniforms hand by hand with their mums and dads. I asked my sister to stay at home and helped her to sleep before I off to school. She was 4 years old back then.

I walked to school by myself and registered my own self. When the teacher asked me, 'where is your mum?', I just could give her my forceful smile. During the day, I just felt like going home. Not because I hate to be at school, but I'm worried about my sister. When the teacher said that I could go home, I walked quickly and found out that my sister was waiting for me at the gate school.

Dear sister,
At that moment, you gave me a hope. You gave me a 'spiritual security'..knowing that someone still watching out for me. You probably don't have any idea about this as you were still young.

Dear Mum,
Most people around me keep on saying I should call you. They said we should keep in touch. The elders said its wrong for me to ignore you.I just can smile and say I will.Nobody knows about this as I keep it. They can say anything but they won't feel the pain that haunting me till now. I just want you to know. I don't blame you.There was no one to blame. Make it simple... it was wrong time and wrong place for us.

Dear 'future me',
Today,I promise myself that one day when I get married ,I'll try my very best not to be the best mum in the world but a mother for my children.

Just Because

Just because you treat me this way
doesn't meant I have to give all up
it hurts
but who cares?
Glad to know
I'm just another option for you